


A Single Father

by Rachel_Lu



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Parents, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Children, Discovery, F/M, Falling In Love, Father-Daughter Relationship, Grief/Mourning, Single Father, Single Parents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-19
Updated: 2017-08-07
Packaged: 2018-12-04 07:07:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 16,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11550063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rachel_Lu/pseuds/Rachel_Lu
Summary: John Tyler's wife, Romana, dies in a horrific accident, and when her friend from work, Rose Tyler, offers to help with John's grief, he is a bit reluctant at first, but finds himself drawn to her in a way he feels he shouldn't be, while also caring for the children his wife left him with, including a daughter who knows John is not her real father.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I’ve made some major changes to Single Father, simply because I don’t want to write Doctor x anybody that’s not Rose, and I’ve found that going through and watching a series and typing line for line is EXHAUSTING, like I did for my Tangled AU, so the characters are the same, and the basic idea is the same, but parts of it are going to be definitely different, and most of it is told through Rose’s POV, so please know that going in. You will not be getting the exact same Single Father experience you got from the show. Since it’s a miniseries I don’t anticipate it being too long. Enjoy Chapter 1! :)

John had been Romana’s husband. Rose knew that.  Hell, she had known Romana before she started teaching, and she knew that Romana had positively adored him.

So when the famous husband came to pick up Romana’s things from their work, Rose felt her heart burst for him.  She approached him at Romana’s desk and touched his shoulder, startling with him when he jumped.

“I’m sorry,” She said apologetically. “I just… Um, do you need any help?”

“I-” he clenched his jaw and looked down at the two boxes of things.  “Sure, if you’d like. Thank you.”

Rose nodded.  “Okay,” She picked up one of the boxes and stared after John.  “I was close with Romana,” she said. “I work part time as a teacher now, but I still saw her here everyday.”

He looked up at her, his dreadfully sad eyes meeting hers for the first time. “Really?” He asked.

She nodded, shifting her grip on the box, “Yeah, she talked about you all the time, like, all the time,” she laughed a little and felt it catch in her throat as her own tears welled up. “Um, sorry, I just… It’s hard, you know, though, not at all as hard as it would be for you, so that’s insensitive of me, I’m sorry.”

“No,” John stopped her. “Everyone so far has just told me that they know exactly how I feel.  Thank you for not doing that.”

She gave a tight smile. “Of course. I’d like to help, in any way that I can,” she said, hoping that her voice proved how sincere she was about it. She didn’t want John to think she was just trying to piggyback onto his grief because she had been friends with Romana, because it wasn’t that at all.

“Well, come on, we’ll strap these to my bike.”

“Your bike?”

“Yes, I ride a motorcycle.”

“They won’t stay.  I can drive them to your house, if you like.  I don’t want you losing any of this stuff.”

John regarded her carefully.  “I suppose you’re right, but you’re working, I couldn’t put you out like that.”

“Well, things have been a little slack around here, since everyone’s just struggling a bit.  But, Mr. Tyler, really, I’d love to help.”

John blinked. “Oh, I’m sorry, I don’t even know your name.”

“Rose Tyler.”

His eyes widened and he laughed a little, a very uncomfortable, tight laugh, but somehow, she could tell that it was genuine.  He regarded her carefully. “That’s very odd,” he said.  

She nodded, “I guess that is kind of weird,” she admitted. “Come on, I’ll drive you home.”

The both of them walked down to Rose’s car in silence, and she didn’t know quite what to say to him, so she decided not to say anything at all. It would just be better, she admitted, if she could just settle her stomach, and speaking wouldn’t make it any better.

“So, you know Romana?”

Shit, he was going to make her talk.

She adjusted her grip on the box to look for her keys. “Yeah, my office is right next to hers.  We got lunch together a lot, she talked about her kids and you.  She was happier every day than I have ever been,” she admitted. “Speaking of, Mr. Tyler, why didn’t your assistant come down to help you with all of this?”

He shrugged. “She’s my daughter, from a… Um, from my last marriage.  She has other things to do, and I couldn’t ask her to help me with this.”

“Sure you could, she’s your daughter.  That’s what family is for.”

“It’s all been a bit splintered,” John said, “Since Romana died.”

Rose nodded and pulled open the back door of her little yellow car. “I understand,” she said, “At least, I think I do.”  She put her box in the car and held her hands out for his.  Wordlessly, he gave it to her and she settled the box next to hers.  Shutting the door, she gestured to the passenger seat and then walked around the front of the car to get into the driver’s seat. 

She felt as though one of them should be talking, but she couldn’t really think of anything to say that wouldn’t be dreadfully insulting.  She glanced over at him and voiced the only words that were appropriate.

“Could you give me your address?” She asked softly.

He scrunched his eyebrows up in a way that made it look like he was shaming himself for not telling her before they got in the car. “Of course,” he said, “Sorry.”

He read off his address to her and she started up her car, remarking that she knew exactly where his home was. 

“Maybe Romana spoke of you,” John said finally, looking over at Rose. “I can’t say I remember.”

“I don’t imagine she would,” Rose admitted, “We were work friends, we knew a lot about each other, but that doesn’t really warrant her telling her husband about me.”

He squinted at her. “Are you the one with the rubbish boyfriend? She mentioned someone at the office had one of those.”

Rose laughed, a little tightly.  “I guess you could say that.  He wants to settle down, that’s all.”

“You don’t?” 

She hesitated. “I don’t know,” she said finally.  “But, enough about that. What do you do?”

He seemed puzzled by her switch and her question, and so she gave him a minute to re-orient himself.  It seemed that he had loads of trouble using brain power, and Rose didn’t blame him.  He must be exhausted.  His eyes were glassy and after a moment, he blinked, as though clearing out any unwanted thoughts.

“I’m a photographer.”

“That sounds lovely. I love pictures.”

“Do you?”

“Well, yes, doesn’t everyone?”

“You’d be surprised.”

They talked a bit, but it was strained and eventually he figured out that yes, Romana had talked about her, and he reassured Rose that Romana had positively adored her, which only made Rose feel like breaking down into tears.

“I’m sorry I didn’t remember you,” he said, “She said you were very kind, and very funny, and you deserve better than what you get.”

“I’m afraid I can’t be very funny for you today.”

“Well, to be fair, I’m glad you aren’t.”

“Thank goodness.”

“The funeral is tomorrow, Rose. I’d like you to be there.”

She swallowed hard. The reality of her friend’s death had been acknowledged, but agreeing to go to the funeral was something that she had not anticipated.  She hadn’t even anticipated being invited, really.

“I considered Romana to be one of my best friends,” she said softly, “It would be horrible of me, if I didn’t go.”

John quietly gave her the address of the church and she wrote everything down on a napkin from her glove compartment when they pulled into his driveway.

“Thank you, Rose,” John said, and started to get out of the car.

“You’re going to need help,” she replied, getting out and unlocking the backseat. “You can’t carry them both without dropping one.”

Without waiting for him to say anything, she opened the backseat of the car and pulling out the box on that side. She shut the door with her hip and John looked at her, waiting for her to stop and just give him the other box.

“You don’t take no for an answer, do you?” He asked, arching an eyebrow at her.

“Not typically, no, and especially not when I know you need help. Got it?”

He swallowed, but smiled a little. “Yes, ma’am.”  He jerked his chin towards his door.  “Just so you know, my children aren’t home, so you won’t be meeting them.”

“That’s alright.  They… Um, they’re going back to school already?”

John nodded.  “If they stayed home, we’d all just sit and wallow together, and we… We can’t do that.  Romana wouldn’t want it.”

“I think you’re right,” Rose acknowledged, hoping to encourage him.

The two of them walked up into his house, and Rose tried not to stare around at it.  It was beautiful, not overly large, and very cozy and homy.  Rose wondered what parts of it Romana had decorated, and what parts were John’s touches.

There were pictures up, but some of them were clearly taken down, as there were nails in the wall with no pictures on them.  She shook herself and looked to John, waiting for him to tell her where to put the box.

“Just put them in the living room,” he said, walking towards the room, and Rose followed him.  She set down the box she was carrying on the floor.  

He set his box down next to hers.  “Would you like to stay for some tea?” He asked her carefully. She shook her head.

“Thank you, but no.  I should get back to work.”  She laced her fingers together in front of her, “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Here,” he held out his hand, “I’ll give you my phone number, so you can get in touch with me if you get lost or anything.”

“Thanks,” she said, placing her phone in his hand.  He silently gave her his number and handed it back to her.  “Let me know tomorrow if you have any trouble. I- um, I’m sorry, but you probably won’t know anybody besides me there.”

“Well, if it’s not too much trouble, I’d love to meet your kids.  Romana talked about them all the time.” Rose wasn’t sure if she’d overstepped her bounds, but she hoped not. She hoped that talking about someone that was living and breathing might help John out a bit, make him feel more attuned to the world around him.

Besides, she didn’t want to talk about her dead friend anymore.  She’d cried enough.

John smiled a little, and this one looked genuine. “I’d love for you to meet them,” he said, “I’m sure they’d love to hear your stories about Romana when you worked together.”

“Yeah, I’m sure they would.”

The silence that fell between them was simply thoughtful and not awkward. Finally, John lifted his eyes back to hers.

“Thank you,” he said, “For helping me.”

“Of course.  Please don’t hesitate to contact me if you need anything else.”

He nodded resolutely.  “Yes, of course,” he said.  “I am a bit sick of my family at this point, it might do me good to talk to someone who doesn’t just tell me how sorry they are. I’ve heard that enough.”

“I’ll imagine you have,” Rose said sympathetically, her heart going out to this poor man.  How awful, she thought, to have to raise children on his own when he was so used to having her at his side.  Children that were reminders of her, had her eyes or her smile.

She shook herself of that thought. “I’ll see you tomorrow,” she said, clenching her hand around her keys and turning back to her car.

“See you tomorrow.”

She noticed he didn’t call her by ‘Ms. Tyler’ and wondered if that was simply because that was a title that was attached to his wife.  She and Romana had always teased about that, how on some level they must be the same person for that to be some sort of monstrous coincidence.  

There was little fun in the office, now that she was gone, and Rose was determined that, after the grieving period was over, she was going to try to bring back the same excitement that Romana had brought to the workplace.  In a way, Rose sensed that she would have wanted it that way.

There was also no denying that John Tyler was a very attractive man, and very young for having so many children, one old enough to run as his assistant. She sighed heavily.  It wouldn’t do her any good to think thoughts like that, and it would only be a betrayal to Romana in her mind.  She got into her car, still feeling John’s eyes on the back of her head as she got in her car and prepared to go back to work.

Romana was hit by a police car, they said, when the car was in a high speed chase.  Rose wondered if John feared cars now.


	2. Chapter 2

The morning of Romana’s funeral dawned grey and cloudy, and Rose found that she thought it was very appropriate.  She waited till the very last moment to get dressed and ready for her friend’s funeral.  She didn’t want to see her buried.  

Clenching her fists at her sides, she stared at herself in the mirror, in a black dress that fell to her knees and black high heeled shoes. She didn’t want to bother John, so she opted to not call him and instead find the address of the church he had given her and skip out on her own.  It would be fine, really, she decided, she could make it.  She’d been driving for long enough that it wouldn’t be an issue, and she couldn’t inconvenience John on a day like this.  Possibly one of the worst days of his life.

She made it to the church, went dreadfully early so that she could sit in the car and grip her steering wheel until the tears were bit all the way back and she could successfully walk in without making a spectacle of herself.  

After a few moments of collecting her thoughts and energy, she got out of her car and walked into the church.  She signed the book that was full of messages for John and his family “My love to our Romana, and to you all”.  It seemed impersonal, but she knew  _ Romana,  _ not the family of her coworker and friend.  She looked at the words, written in black, that didn’t look to be enough.  She felt like she should say more.  But there were no more words.  She signed her name under her little message and then went to sit in the back pew of the church, twisting her hands in her lap.

There were five people sitting up in the front of the church, young people and children, and Rose could only assume that they were John and Romana’s children.  She watched them interact with one another, and how the oldest girl, John’s daughter, and how she seemed to be very patient with the other children.  

Rose looked away, feeling like she was invading on a personal conversation.  She looked at her hands and only looked up when she saw herself being addressed by her name.

She looked up and saw John.  She stood up, regarding him in the suit that he was wearing. He smiled at her and she smiled weakly back.  

“Hello,” She said.

“Thank you for coming, it means a lot to me,” John said.

“I was happy to come,” She winced, “For support,”  She covered her face in her hands, burning with embarrassment, especially since she hadn’t really done anything wrong. It was just a bit of a slip.

John’s hands went to her shoulders and he squeezed lightly. “I understand,” he said softly, “it’s a bit taxing for all of us. Would you like to meet my children?”

She moved her hands and nodded.  “Yeah, I’d love to.”

He led her to the front of the church, where his children were sitting.  “Kids, this is Rose Tyler, she worked with your mother.”

“She talked about you,” a young girl, probably a teenage, in the middle piped up, her too mature black dress making Rose’s heart twist.  “She liked you.”

“And I liked her,” Rose assured the girl.

“That’s Lucy,” John said. “This is my oldest, Tanya, and then there’s Paul, and Ewan, and you met Lucy of course.”

“I know her,” Evie said, “She’s my teacher.”

John furrowed his brows. “What?”

Rose smiled a little. “I teach for a woman who’s on maternity leave at Evie’s school.  She’s in my class.”

“Oh,” John blinked, seemingly blindsided by this information.

“It’s really nice to meet all of you.” Rose said.

All the children shook hands with her, and John nodded to his children, telling them silently that they had done well.

“Your father tells me that you work as his assistant, Tanya,” Rose said, hoping she’d gotten the child right, but she supposed the Tanya was the oldest.  “How do you.. Um, enjoy that?”

“I think it’s brilliant,” Tanya said, “Though, of course, it’s not exactly my dream job.”  She smiled weakly, “But I like it.”

“That’s good,” Rose said, nodding, probably a bit too much. “Right. That’s great.”  
“I’m six,” Evie said softly.

Rose smiled.  “Are you?”

“Yes,” she nodded firmly, and then looked down at her little hands, making Rose almost burst with tears. The little girl really had no idea that her mother was gone.  How would she have known?  She was just a little girl.

Rose bit her lip and looked to John for help, wanting some way to make this conversation less awkward.

He smiled a little tightly at her. “It is a bit disconcerting, having your assistant call you ‘dad’.”

Tanya sensed he was trying to change the mood and replied, “Oi, well, I’m not calling you sir.”

“I suppose you wouldn’t,” John said, laughing a little..

Rose smiled at him, liking the way a smile looked on his face. Her heart was truly saddened, but if a little bit of joy could be found, then maybe everything would alright.

John made Rose sit at the front of the church with them, which Rose really didn’t want to do because she knew that she would be crying and she didn't’ want to cry in front of John and his children. It would probably be borderline insulting if she were to cry in front of them.

However, once the service started, she was done in, pulling out a packet of tissues from her bag and leaning down, pressing her whole face into one, not wanting anyone to look at her. 

She felt the tissues be moved from her lap, and Rose looked over to see John taking a tissue from the packet, his jaw set, clearly holding back tears.  He didn’t look at her, and set the tissues back in her lap.

She sat back and tried to control herself a little bit, twisting her hands into the skirt of her dress until her knuckles turned white.  She didn’t look at John for the rest of the service, even though he spoke at the alter.  She blocked it out, because she was tired of crying, and she had to go back to work tomorrow, and this wasn’t fair at all, any wasn’t life ever  _ fair? _

“I should go home,” Rose said after the service, when John said goodbye to the rest of his guests but asked her to stay.

“I wanted to talk to you,” he said, walking to the back of the church, rubbing one of his eyes with two fingers.  She followed him, not knowing what he could possibly want from her, or what he would want to say.  His children were still at the front of the church, speaking quietly as Evie hugged the photo of her mum that had been set up.

“If I’ve done something wrong, I’m really sorry,” Rose said, “I didn’t want to ruin anything, I really didn’t. I’m sorry.”

“You didn’t ruin anything,” John said with surprise as they stepped outside. The weather had grown sunny and bright, which didn’t seem to be fair.  He turned to face her. “I wanted to thank you for coming today, and for not telling me how sorry you are.”

“But-”

“I know you  _ are  _ sorry, and that’s enough. “I’m sick of hearing it every few hours from people. Over and over, that’s all I hear. It’s all getting to be a bit much. You’re the closest to normal any person has been to me since Romana’s passing.  And I think I might need your help with something.”

“What’s that?” Rose asked softly, crossing her arms and rocking back on her heels, “I don’t know what I could possibly help you with.”

John blew out a sigh.  “Lucy isn’t mine, she’s Romana’s and this man… A previous relationship.  She won’t stop asking about him, she wants to meet with him.”

“How could I possibly help with that?” Rose asked softly, “Unless you wanted me to drive her, which I could,” she hurried to add.  

“Oh, no, not that,” he said, “I just need your help checking into some things about the father. I’ve never met him.”

“Ah, I see,” Rose said, feeling a little awkward. “I can do whatever you’d like to help with that,” She said, nodding.  

“I’ll call you, when all this settles down.” he said, sounding very tired, and it was just then that Rose noticed the bags under his eyes. It was a wonder he was still upright, really.  He looked to her a bit pleadingly, as though he might be afraid that she would say no to him, that she wanted to know everything right now.

She bit her lip. “Okay,” she said, “I’m sure Lucy won’t pressure you.”

“Oh, she has been.”

“Well, that can’t be easy for you,” She said softly, “If there’s anything I can do to help, at all, please let me know,” She said, “I want your whole family to feel… Comfortable, at the very least.”

He nodded to her, his gratefulness evident in his eyes. “Thank you,” he said.  

“And be sure to call me if you want somebody who doesn’t just say ‘sorry’,” Rose said.  

“Thank you,” he said, sounding dreadfully relieved. “I’ll give you a call later on.  Thank you very much, Rose.”

John and Rose spoke several times over the course of the next few days, though she didn’t often actually see him.  He spoke about Lucy’s father, and she had a feeling that it really bothered him more than it thought it should.  Perhaps he thought less of Romana because of it all.

“She’s gone,” he told her one night.  “She left.”

“Who?”

“Lucy.  She’s left.”

“What, she’s missing?” Rose stood from the couch, where she’d been sitting, waiting for takeaway.

“Yes, she’s just hopped the bus or something, I couldn’t catch her.  She just told me I wasn’t her father, she wanted her dad. I can’t- how can I-” 

“I’m coming over there,” Rose said firmly, hearing the tears start to build up in his voice. “Okay?  I’m going to come over there and we’ll talk about it.”

“Okay.”

She knew John, at the moment, was a flight risk. She knew that he drove his bike too fast, the engine revving hard. She knew he got in trouble for it, knew he’d been pulled over. He drove too fast in the rain, possibly hoping to hydroplane, hoping to die.  Tanya had told her all that, knowing that she herself couldn’t do anything to fix it, but maybe Rose could, since she wasn’t related to him.

Was he really that far gone?

She’d tried to talk to him about it, maybe even coax him out of it, but he would not be shifted. He’d snapped at her, told her not to worry about him.

She wondered why it mattered so much to her that he was safe.  Perhaps it was because he had so many children to look after, now all on his own.  Or maybe it was because she felt Romana’s absence acutely, not seeing her every day at the office.  It still felt odd, even two months later.  

Rose pulled her purse over her shoulder and wasted no time in trying to get to John’s house, despite any traffic that might be coming through.  She broke the speed limit, afraid he might do something desperate, but knowing that he was sitting at home because he knew she was coming. At the very least, he wouldn’t be getting on his motorbike before she got there.  

His door was unlocked, and there were no children running about the house.  She furrowed her brows, wondering where everybody was.

“John?”

No response.  She pursed her lips and set her purse down by the door, shutting the front door behind her.  “John?  It’s Rose where are you?”

She hated going through his house, but she had to, peering into every room in the house until she found him in the upstairs bathroom, sitting against his bathtub, his knees up and his hands in front of his mouth.  He had clearly just been crying, and she closed the door behind them to further allow the illusion that they were alone.

“Hey,” She said, and he simply looked at her, his eyes watering and dimple standing out.  After a moment, he spoke.

“She went straight to her gran’s,” he said softly.

After a few more seconds, Rose couldn’t help but feel overwhelming pity. “Oh, John,” she got down onto the floor next to him and rubbed his shoulders, trying to calm him.

“I can’t do this,” he said, finally pulling his hands away from his mouth so that she could understand him completely.  “I can’t do this without Romana, I  _ miss  _ her.”

He started crying harder than she’d ever seen him, even at her funeral. Borderline sobbing, his head bowed forward. Rose scooted closer to him and held onto his head as it landed on her shoulder.  She felt so horrible for him, for what he must be feeling.

She tried to comfort him as best she could as he spoke about how most people were probably living their own lives without her, but they didn’t see her every day like he did.  Rose closed her eyes, trying to fight off tears of her own.

He came close to hug her, his one hand on the side of her neck, the other around her back.  She pressed her nose to his shoulder and tried to embrace him back as best as she could.

“You know, don’t you, you do,” He said softly,

“Yeah, I do.”

He was quieting slightly, and whispered, “I can’t do this.”

“What?” Rose pulled back to look him in the eye. “What?  Yes, you can. John, you’re a great dad, everything you’ve told me about your kids, you love them  _ so  _ much.”

He shook his head.

“Yes, you can and you will, and you know what? You’re not going to do it on your own.”

He bent towards her again, and on a bit of an impulse, she kissed his forehead before holding his head gently and he pressed his forehead to hers.

Something shifted in the air between them. Something that was so dreadfully tangible that both of them realized it was happening and didn’t do a damn thing about it.  Apparently needing some kind of separate reassurance, he leaned forward and pressed a chaste kiss to her lips, one that she would allow as something still friendly.

But then his hand at the back of her head drew her in again, and he kissed her for a second time. After letting her back for a moment, the both of them moved in at the same time, and he kissed her deeply, wrapping his arms around her.  She responded, her eyes squeezed shut as she let him control the kiss, dominating her powerfully.  

After several long moments that made her heart beat dangerously hard, they both pulled back, gasping for air.  They watched each other, but neither said anything.  The only thing that broke them fully apart was the sound of the doorbell ringing.

Rose scooted back and rubbed her hands over her face.  “I should go.”

“Rose-”

“No, no, I should go, um, call me, if you need anything.”

“That’s probably someone bringing Lucy back from her gran’s, I can-”

“Okay, that’s um, that’s good. I’ll see you.”

She bolted, slipping out the back door instead of the front, not wanting Lucy to see her.  When she was sure everyone was inside, she left, feeling like she would never see John again.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh I hope you guys are enjoying this story so far :) and I hope you don't mind the changes!

As she expected, Rose didn’t hear from John for several days, and that was just as well, because she was spending her days wallowing in enormous guilt.  Mickey had taken her on a few dates since her absolutely life changing kiss with John, and she couldn’t stop thinking like she was keeping the most enormous secret in the world.

Mickey was good to her, but she didn’t love him.  She definitely didn’t.  She let him kiss her and be near to her, and let him do what he wanted.  But she didn’t get any joy from being near him, and she felt depressed when she was alone.  So neither was good, nothing was good for her.

“Are you okay?” Mickey asked her one night when she kept checking her phone.  He wasn’t suspicious, just seemed worried.

Nevertheless, she felt monumentally guilty, knowing she was checking her phone to see if everything was okay. “Yeah, just… Romana, you know?  And I still have classes to teach, and I teach her daughter.  It’s just hard.”

“Yeah, I can see it weighing on you,” Mickey said, and she felt so bad that she stayed at his flat an extra hour to make up for her guilt. 

That night, when she got home, she sent John a quick text:  _ Hoping you’re okay.  See you at parent’s night tomorrow. _

As expected, he didn’t reply.  She hadn’t really thought that he would, but she couldn’t help from feeling disappointed, and so she slipped her phone into her pocket and tried to get ready for the parent’s night that she wasn’t looking forward to at all.  She was really doing her best to not be upset about the whole thing.

She breathed out a sigh and started to get ready for bed.  This was ridiculous, and she knew it, with every part of herself. She didn’t need to think about that kiss with John anymore.  It was just destroying her in many ways, and she needed to let it go.

She carded her hands through her hair and crawled under the covers, pushing all thoughts from her mind.

The next morning, when she walked into her class, Evie approached Rose’s desk and pushed her glasses up. “Is Dad coming tonight?” She asked.

Rose folded her hands on her desk. “Um, I don’t know, Evie. I’d have to ask Ms. Noble to see if he’s on the schedule for tonight,” she said softly.  

“Will you look?”  
“Sure, Evie.”

As it turned out, John did not ever sign up for parent’s night, so there was no record of him being on the schedule.  She looked to Donna a bit helplessly, gesturing at the table they were sitting at together.

“He’s… he’s got to come,” Rose said softly, “Evie wants him to come,’ she said, “She asked me about it this morning.”

Donna nodded. “I can slip him in at four,” she said, “But you’ll have to call him and get him to come down,” she said.

“Yeah, I can call him,” she nodded.  “I can…” She sighed. “I can try to get him to come.”

Donna smiled a little. “And I hope it works out,” she said, “I know that he’s had a rough go of it, but this is about his daughter,” she sighed, “I was hoping that he would still try and be present for her.”

Rose shrugged, “I didn’t meet him before Romana’s death,” she said, “But he seems like a really good dad.  He really cares about his kids, and-” she didn’t know what else to say, really. “I’ll try to get in touch with him,” she finished abruptly.

Donna nodded.  “Okay, sounds good,” she said.  “Have a good rest of your day, Rose.”

“Yeah, you too.”

After all the students left for the day, except for Evie, who had not been picked up, Rose decided she could call John.  Evie was sitting in Donna’s office, and Rose felt very odd about the whole thing.

She dialed John’s number and pressed her phone to her ear, pushing a little harder onto her ear than she should have.  It went to voicemail, and she sighed, closing her eyes.

“Hi, John, it’s Rose.  I just wanted to let you know that you’re slotted in at four o’ clock for parents night, so, um… Also, Evie is still here? I dunno if Lucy was maybe supposed to pick her up, or one of your other kids, but she’s in Donna office.  Okay. See you tonight.”  She hung up and started down at her phone, not knowing how she even got up the courage to type in his number and ring him. It was obvious he wanted nothing to do with her.

Regardless of his thoughts towards her, she hoped that perhaps he would at least come for his daughter. She knew he loved his kids, that he was a good dad, and finally, she sighed, scrubbing her hand over her face.  It would do her well to forget all about that kiss they had shared. It didn’t mean anything after all, it was just a kiss, in the heat of the moment because they had both been hurting. It was comfort, nothing more.  

And what was more, he was  _ Romana’s husband.  _ Even if she was gone, it was incredibly inappropriate for her to be chasing her friend’s husband.  

She ran her hand through her hair and blew out her cheeks.  She had about an hour until parent’s night started, so she started to clean up her classroom, making sure all the books and everything that the kids touched would get put away and crumbs would be wiped off of the counters and tables.  She didn’t usually clean her own classroom, but she had a feeling that the parents would be looking even closer at her room while they were in it, and so she wanted it to look as nice as possible.  

When the first parent came in, Rose pushed all her thoughts of John aside and smiled brightly at the mother and father who had entered the room. 

“I’m Rose Tyler,” she said, sticking her hand out for both of them, “I’m taking over for the normal teacher of this class for the year.”

“Yes, we know, our son loves you!”

After a few of the interviews with the parents, Rose was feeling much more at ease, until she looked up from the parent that she was currently coaching and saw John sitting outside her door, hands laced in front of him, between his knees.  He looked at her and she glanced away from him when he made eye contact.

When the parents in the room shook her hand and left, she waved John in with a flick of her fingers.  He watched her for a moment, and she looked back at her papers, feeling uncomfortable. She pulled out Evie’s portfolio, filled with the art pieces and maths work.  She smiled a little.  Evie was such a bright and colorful girl, though solemn at times now that her mum was gone, though of course, Rose could hardly fault her for that.

When John didn’t enter the room, Rose looked up again, and waved for him to come in again, a bit more impatiently this time.  He wiped his palms on his jeans and got to his feet, approaching her room.  He opened the door and came in to sit adjacent to her, the way the chairs were set up.  She looked up at him from Evie’s files.

“So, you got my message then?  I left a message on your mobile.”

He furrowed his brows at her and took his phone from his pocket, peering at the screen.  She saw that her message was still on the home screen.  He unlocked the phone and then locked it again before looking at her and smiling a little sheepishly. “I didn’t.”

She blinked. “Oh, well, I thought you were just- oh, so you didn’t know about this-”

“No,” he replied, shaking his head.

“Well, I tried to warn you.”

He smiled. “Thanks.”  He shifted in his seat, “Look, about what happened, with us, I’m-”

“Don’t,” she held her hand up.  “It’s alright, John, really.”  She shrugged, and looked down at her files. “It was just… How we were feeling, we needed comforted, that’s all.  And we’re… Friends, I just- we needed to be close.  It’s understandable.”

He nodded, “Yeah, but, imagining someone walking in on that.  And you’ve got a boyfriend, so-”

“Yeah, no Mickey wouldn’t like that, but he didn’t see, so… But look, I don’t think this should make us uncomfortable with each other, you know?  Cause it was innocent, really it was,” Rose said, almost begging him to understand what she was trying to say.  John nodded a little, his eyes searching hers.

A man burst into the room, then, looking furious. “I’m here for the four eleven appointment.”

Rose peered up at the man. “No, no, you’re down for 5:20, not-”

“Well, I traded for the four eleven slot, and it’s four eleven. I don’t think my son is learning enough, what are you teaching him?”  
Rose raised her eyebrows and got to her feet. “I think you should leave until Mr. Tyler and I are done here, this is his appointment.”

“It’s four eleven.”

“Yes, well, this is my classroom, so I’m going to have to ask you to wait outside.”  Without waiting for his answer she walked to the door and held it open, looking at the man pointedly. As the man passed her, he said something in a foreign language. Rose’s eyes snapped and she replied in the same language as she shut the door behind him, the glass reflecting the man’s shocked face.

She returned back to her chair, shrugging as John stared at her. “I can tell anybody off in thirteen languages, he just happened to speak one that I knew.”

“What did you say?”

“I told him not to be rude.”

“And what did he say?”

She smiled sheepishly, “I don’t know, I just assumed it was something rude.”

The two of them laughed, the tension between them fracturing slightly.

“Are we gonna be okay?” Rose asked finally.

“Yeah,” John said nodding. “Yeah.”

She felt relief flood through her and so since that was settled quite nicely, she changed the subject. “And how are things with Lucy?”

“Fine, fine,” John nodded, “She went to school today… Oh, and I found Romana’s diaries from when she was in university, I’m trying to find Lucy’s real dad.”

“Any luck?” Rose asked, leaning on her elbow, invested completely.

“There’s a few names,” John nodded, “That it might be.  Based on… I dunno, just stuff she wrote, names and initials.  I just don’t want the kids to see.”

“They-” Rose furrowed her brows. “Maybe you should work on it in your studio?”

John’s eyes lit up. “Oh,” he said, “I don’t know how I didn’t think of that,” he said thoughtfully.

Rose smiled and looked up at her door.  The Dean was standing there, peering in at them.  She looked back to John and scratched her nose.  “So, uh, Evie’s doing brilliantly, and she seems to be coping very well, probably because she’s so young.  She has, um, sad spells, I guess you could say, but she’s doing well.  She’s brilliant, really.  Very bright.”  She shuffled her papers a bit. “Your time is up,” she said, “You’d better go.”

John ran a hand through his hand and nodded. “Yeah, yeah, you’re right,” he stood. “I’ll call you?”

“Yeah, sure,” She said, shuffling her papers back into her file.  She smiled up at him. “Let me know if you need anything.”

“I will, yeah,” he said, “Thanks.  Thank you.”

She nodded.  “Sure.”

Shortly after parent’s night, Rose went home, where MIckey was supposed to meet her so they could have dinner.  Instead, she was met with an empty house.  She pursed her lips and looked down at a single red rose on the table with a note under it that read ‘match down at the pub tonight, come by if you want x’.  

Rose blew out her cheeks.  So much for date night.  Though Mickey was like that a lot, especially since Romana died.  He said that she was distant. Rose pursed her lips. She wished that he had been here for her a bit more.  Sure, he was around, and he was comforting, but she could tell that his heart wasn’t in it a lot.

Her phone rang about an hour after she got home and she answered before even checking the caller ID.  “Hello?”

“Hi, Rose.”

She blinked. “Oh, John.”

“Yeah, um, listen, I think I’m gonna send out an email to come over to my studio to make sure I’m doing the right thing here.”

“Sure,” Rose said, “Let me just get changed out of my work clothes and I’ll be right over, yeah?”

“Yeah, of course. Thank you.”

“See you in a bit.”

Rose changed, grabbed her purse, and left her house, not even worried about what Mickey might think when he came back.


	4. Chapter 4

John let Rose in when she pulled up to his studio, and he was hunched over his computer when she got there.  She shut the door behind him and approached John, settling her hand on his back.  “You’ll hurt your back doing that.”

He jolted and looked up at her.  “Yeah, I guess,” he said, and hunched right back over.

Rose spotted another chair and off the desk and tugged it next to John’s, sitting down next to him.  “Did you find anything?” She asked him, leaning her elbow on the desk.  

“I sent out an email,” he said, “I was going to wait till you got here, but I just started to get nervous and thought I wouldn’t be able to do it, so I just went ahead and sent it without you. Sorry.”  He scrubbed his hand over his face so hard that Rose winced and pulled his hand away, holding it in both of hers. 

“It’s none of my business, I don’t know why you’re apologizing to me,” She said, “If you think it was the right thing, then it’s fine.”

He stared down at their hands and Rose let go of him, feeling heat rise to her cheeks. “Um, sorry.”

“It’s okay,” John said, smiling a little tightly.  “I guess I just have to wait for the reply, I guess.”

“Yeah, I guess,” She said, “How are you doing?”

He nodded quickly, “Good, yeah, good,” he said, “Fine,” he rubbed his nose. “I just don’t…  It’s strange to think that Lucy’s not mine.  I always knew she wasn’t… But, you know, I  _ raised  _ her, she’s my daughter.”

“I know,” Rose whispered.  “I know.”

She wanted to hug him, but she had a feeling that he wouldn’t appreciate that too much.  Of course, why would he want her touch?  They had agreed that everything was going to be normal between them, that the kiss had been innocent, but she’d been thinking about it more than she cared to admit.  It had been wonderful and more powerful than any kiss she’d ever experienced. 

The computer dinged and John looked at the computer, his eyes wide like he was trying to take in every word at once before his mind could even read them.  “John,” he read, “‘I’ve received your email, and yes, I did know Romana, and I would like to know if there is someplace you would like to meet to discuss your rather ominous email?’”  John turned towards Rose.  

“Do you think he’s her dad?” Rose asked softly.

“Maybe,” John said, but his tone insinuated that he would rather not know, and Rose had to admit that she understood that on some level.  She smiled, trying to be supportive.  

‘Email him back.”

“I need you to come with me, if I meet him,” John said.

“What about any of Romana’s family, or someone who knew her better?” Rose asked. “I don’t- Tanya would go, I’m sure.”

John raised his eyebrows at her. “I’m asking you.”

“Why?”

“Because you are the only normal person on the face of the planet.  And I know Romana’s family would like to think that I was the only man she was ever with, and I don’t think they’d take very kindly to this. Besides, they’d tell Lucy and I don’t want her knowing until I’m certain.”  He cleared his throat and looked to the computer.  “I’ll tell him to meet us as soon as possible,” he said, starting to type out a response.

‘I’m not the only normal person in the world,” Rose said, a little delayed from John’s initial words.

“You’re the only normal person to me,” he said, “You’re the only person who isn’t telling me how to parent and what I should do and what my next move should be.”  He sighed. “I’m tired of being told what to do.”

She could understand that. “Yeah, I guess,” she said, and watched him type out the email.  “His name’s Stuart, then?”

“It would appear to be,” John replied.  “I’ve never put a name to Lucy’s dad, Romana never talked about him.”

“It’s a bit odd, that she never told you,” Rose said, “You were her husband.”

He pursed his lips and nodded. “I thought that too,” he admitted quietly, “I shared everything with her, and reading her diaries… I can’t help but think that she had more secrets from me than I ever thought,” he sat back in his chair. “I had to saw through the lock on the chest just to get to the damn books and they’re all written in code on top of that.”

Rose’s brow crinkled in confusion. She’d written in loads of diaries, sure, but she never really did anything besides hide them.  There was nothing she’d really be embarrassed by if someone stumbled upon them.  She didn’t tell dirty secrets, and she’d never done anything illegal.

“Do you think she was trying to hide something?” Rose asked softly, afraid of setting him off.

He shrugged, “I hope not,” he said, “But I have a feeling that she might be.”

“I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t be, we don’t know that anything’s happened yet,” he said, “All I know is she went to college with this man, nothing more, nothing less, for all I know he’s not even Lucy’s dad.”

“Right,” Rose said, “Now, read that email out and then we’ll send it.”

John nodded. “‘Stuart, thanks for getting back to me. I’d like to meet with you as soon as possible, depending on where you live.  I have a close friend who will be accompanying me to this meeting, as she knew Romana as well.  Please let us know when you are available and we will be in touch.’”  He looked to Rose and she nodded in approval.  

“Sure,” she said.

“I’ll make sure it’s outside school hours,” he assured her, “I really don't’ want to have a go at this alone.”

“Of course not,” Rose agreed.  “Why would you?”

He pressed send and leaned back in his chair again, sighing deeply. “I’m tired of this, Rose,” he said quietly, “I want to be over all of this.”

“Over Romana?”

“Yes.”

“Why’s that?” Rose asked, not understanding.  He loved Romana, or at least he had before, she was sure of it, on some level.  It was clear from her view that Romana had cared for her husband deeply, so Rose wasn’t really sure why he would want to be over her, or even borderline forget her.  

He shrugged weakly. “I’m starting to be convinced that she didn’t love me quite as much as I loved her.”

“Why would you say that?” Rose asked, astonished.

“She had… A series of men, based on her book,” John said softly, “Loads of them that she could have possibly been intimate with. The way she spoke about every man in that book made my stomach turn, and I’m not even through all of them yet.”

“What are you hoping to find?” Rose asked him.

“I don’t know,” John admitted. “I have no idea what I will find in the rest, but I do know that I need to read them. I need to know the real Romana if she didn’t show it to me when we were married.”

Rose was quiet for a moment, having a question, but not knowing if it was appropriate or not. “Are you…”

“What?”  John turned to her, his eyes curious as her voice trailed off. Rose shook her head and waved him off, but he raised his eyebrows at her, now expecting a response.

“Are you afraid that she might have been unfaithful?”

“It’s not the first time that’s crossed my mind,” John said, as though releasing something he had held onto for a long time. “I was suspicious when I was told nothing about Lucy’s father. I feel like I had a right to know, I feel like I still do.”

“I agree,” Rose said. “I would feel the same way.  You’ve raised Lucy, she’s your daughter in every sense of the word except biologically.  I don’t know why Romana wouldn’t tell you.”

“Exactly,” John said tiredly. “Why would she keep that a secret?” He pinched the bridge of his nose and breathed in deeply. “Do you want a drink?”

“I’d love one,” She told him.  

Properly distracted, he stood up and crossed the studio to a small refrigerator. He pulled out two beers and handed her one of them as she met him over by the red couch that sat close to the fridge. She sat down and he sat next to her.

“We don’t have to talk about it anymore,” he said, “Tell me about something else, something that you do.”

“I teach,” Rose said, “Of course, you already know that, but I hold an office job as well,” she said.

“That’s very impressive,” he said.

“I have to make end’s meet,” she said, taking a sip of her drink. “My family grew up really poor, and I’m paying off my debts from Uni.”

“And you have to work two jobs to do that?”

“To do that and pay my rent and my utilities bills, and daily needs,” She nodded, “Yeah. I’ve got loads to take care of.  Sometimes I wonder if I’d ever be able to have a family. I’d never be able to support them.”

John furrowed his brows. “Your boyfriend doesn’t help you?”

‘“He’s a bit useless,” Rose whispered, “He’s nice, but he never thinks of me, at all. It’s like we exist on two different planes unless he wants to go have dinner or drag me out to the pub or come and stay at my house.”

John frowned. “That sounds awful.”

“He tries to be good to me, he just doesn't… Know how, I guess.  He pretends like he’s the best thing for me, and I should thank him for being with him.” She looked down at her drink in her hands. “But I’ve known him forever. So I don’t know how to... “

“You want to break up with him.’

“I want something better than a boyfriend,” Rose said. “He’ll never marry me, he’ll never even talk about moving in. He’s comfortable where we are, and so he’s going to just stay like that.”  She took a long draw of her drink. “I shouldn’t be talking to you about this,” she said, “It’s really insensitive.”

“No, it’s not,” he said, sitting up a little straighter. “I- we’re friends, Rose, I want to know more about you.  You’ve been trying to take care of me this whole time, and you are a very good friend, and I wish I’d met you sooner.”

“Me too,” Rose admitted.

He smiled.  “I think you would’ve been good for me when I was younger.”  

She took another sip of her drink and nodded. “Well, we know each other now.”

“Yeah.  We do.”  He rubbed his eye and tilted his head back.  “It’s been a long three months.  I feel like I’ve known you for longer.”

Rose wrinkled her nose. “Well, I doubt Romana ever talked about me, but she talked about you, and so I feel like I know you, in a way,” She said, tapping the side of her bottle with her fingertips.

“She did.”

“What?”

“She did talk about you,” John said, “You were the one with the ‘useless boyfriend’ and she loved talking to you.” John sighed, “Romana often buried herself in her work and didn’t have many friends at work, so I was… I was very glad that she had you.”

“Thanks,” Rose said.  He watched her carefully.

“Honestly, though, I don’t associate her with you,” he said softly, “You are… Very different, to me.”

“I’m glad,” Rose said softly, “I know it’s hard to separate us, on some level,” She ran her hand through her hair and chewed her bottom lip, having a little bit of trouble meeting his eye.  She was dreadfully attracted to him and she knew that she shouldn’t be, that he was still mourning and she was still trying to sort out her own feelings.  There was no way John was actually attracted to her beyond the kiss that they had shared.

He sat up a little straighter and reached to tuck a piece of hair behind her ear.  He opened his mouth to say something and an alert sound from his computer interrupted them.  He didn’t jump as she expected, but stroked his thumb over her cheek and got to his feet.  She sat stock still, a little shocked, until he spoke to her.

“Stuart says he can meet us tomorrow afternoon.  Are you free after school?” He asked her, turning to look at her.

“Yeah,” Rose said, a little spaced out.

“Okay,” John gave her the address of a cafe near the school, “Can you meet me there?”

“Sure,” Rose nodded.  “I can meet you there once I’m done with classes.  About four?”

“I’ll tell him,” John said, typing for a bit and then sending the email.  “Okay, it’s set.”  He stood up and wiped his hands on his pants.  

“Okay,” Rose said, taking another long drink from her beer. “Sounds good.  I should probably go,” she said.

“Oh, um, okay,” he approached her as she stood up. “Thanks for helping me out,’ he said, “it means a lot.”

“Of course.  I’ll see you tomorrow.”

She left his studio, feeling him watching her and wondering if she had made the right decision to go with him.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So not really related to the chapter but I'm pretty sure I want my next AU to be an Assassins AU, would you guys be into that? If not, I'll think of something else but I've been wanting to write that one for awhile.
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy this chapter! Please review!

 

Rose and John went to meet Stuart at the allotted date and time, and when they sat waiting for him, Rose could tell that John was colossally nervous. She reached over and settled her hand on his.

“It’s okay,” She said softly, “We might have answers today, and if we don’t, it’s just back to the drawing board.”  She squeezed his hand and he smiled tightly at her, his eyes crinkling with the effort. She wondered if he could burst a blood vessel doing that, it was really entirely possible.  

He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair.  “He knew Romana, that’s enough for me to be almost entirely convinced,” he said, looking over at Rose.

She shook her head. “You’re jumping to conclusions.  Let’s just see what he has to say, okay?” 

“Okay,” John said softly.  “You are quite literally being my sanity,” he smiled at her a little, a genuine thing that was very gentle and made her want to protect him from any bad things that could happen to him. 

A man entered the cafe then, a man who looked a bit older than John but was probably just a business professional.  John and Rose both stood as he entered.  

“You must be John,” the man said, shaking his hand.  

“Yes, and this is a friend of mine, Rose Tyler,” John said, gesturing to Rose.

Rose shook Stuart’s hand and the three of them sat down. Stuart watched the both of them for a few moments, not seeming to know exactly what he was doing there or what he was supposed to be doing.

“Your emails were a bit cryptic, John,” Stuart said, “What’s going on?”

“You knew Romana in University?” John said, effectively dodging the question while still beginning his answer.  Rose understood this but was slightly annoyed by the whole thing.  The two men stared at each other and Rose sighed.

“So did you know Romana or not? We can’t tell you unless we know,” She said, kicking John’s ankle under the table. He looked at Rose apologetically and then back to Stuart, waiting for him to answer.

Stuart nodded. “Yeah, I knew her.  We went to uni together.  She was absolutely electric, lots of people positively adored her.  Really.  But who are you?”

Rose smiled a little. “I think that’s a question for John, really,” she said, raising her eyebrows at John.”

John ran his hand through his hair again, scratching the back of his neck.  “Romana was my wife, we had four, well, three children together,” he looked to Rose for support and swallowed hard.  “One of the children is from a previous relationship,” he said, “And her age lines up with your initials, when they were used in Romana’s diaries.”

“Right.  Rebecca.”

John’s jaw clenched.  He blinked a few times, looking between Rose and Stuart. “What?” he asked softly.

“Here, let me-” he cut himself off and pulled his computer out of his bag.  After pulling it up and typing something in, he turned the computer to face Rose and John.  Rose furrowed her brows in confusion.

“That’s Lucy.” Rose pointed at the picture.  “That’s not… You said Rebecca.”

“Romana told me her name was Rebecca.”

John’s face crumpled but he pushed it back, scratching the side of his face and looking back to Stuart. “What do you mean, ‘Romana told you’?  What- you spoke to her?”

“Yes,” Stuart said, “That’s, um- Rebecca, or, no, Lucy, I suppose, is my daughter.  And Romana told me that soon after she was born.  She’d send me a photo of her every year, and we’d meet and talk.”

“You’d meet?” John sounded so dismayed that Rose just wanted to gather him up in her arms and take him home so that he didn’t have to listen to this.

Stuart looked suddenly very concerned.  “Wait, she never told you?” 

“No,” John said quietly, almost as though he was trying to contain everything that was inside him.  He was a bit angry, she could tell, he was practically vibrating with it. 

“Yeah, Romana told me I could meet her when she turned eighteen, but… the moment I suggested I pay for part of her education of support her financially in any way, I was back to one picture a year.”

Rose cocked her head. “Did she ever mention John and the other kids?”  
“I knew she was married, didn’t know who to, though. And I certainly didn’t know about other kids.”

Rose looked to John, waiting for him to say something, knowing this conversation needed to be more about him than her, even if she felt like she needed to be his translator.  He looked to her and lifted a shoulder.

“I am… Surprised to say the least, Stuart.”

He winced, and nodded, and Rose thought for a moment that he might possibly understand.  “How is she? How is, um… Lucy?”

“She’s fine.” Rose said, cutting John off before he could say anything.  “Good girl, yeah.”  
“She wants to meet you,” John said, “But I wanted to meet you first, I’ve been tracking you down because Romana never _told_ me anything about you,” He crossed his arms and leaned back in his chair, not quite scowling at the man, but giving him a good hard stare.

“Of course, I don’t blame you at all.  But does that mean- Romana, I mean-”

“She’s dead,” John said bluntly.  “Motorway accident.”

Stuart’s jaw dropped. “She’s- I had a feeling something was wrong, so I thought maybe she was in the hospital, but-”

“No,” John said, “She passed about three months ago.  Rose here used to work with her.”

“On one of my jobs, yeah.” Rose said softly. 

“You work two jobs then?” Stuart said.

“Yeah, but this is hardly about me,” Rose furrowed her brows, and felt herself blushing a little bit.  “This is about Lucy.”

“Right,” Stuart said, “Sorry, you were just a friend of John’s, I thought.”

“I met Romana first,” Rose said, “Didn’t know John till he came to pick up her stuff from work after she died.”

“Whatever you’re insinuating about the two of us, Stuart, you can stop it now,” John said. “I’ll decide if you can meet Lucy, since she’s not yet eighteen. I’ll call you.”

“Right,” Stuart said, “Of course.  I would love to meet her, I really would, and I, um- I’m terribly sorry about what happened to Romana.”

“Us too,” Rose said.  “Here, John, give him your mobile, and then he can put himself in.” She turned to Stuart.  “Make sure you give us a ring if you want to chat about it, but honestly, this whole thing is up to John.”

“Right,” Stuart said.

They exchanged numbers and Stuart checked his watch.  “I should get going, I’ve got a meeting,” he said, looking a little awkward. “Thank you for meeting me, I’d love to talk to you in the future about discussing Lucy, maybe meeting her, if you’d be agreeable.”

“Sure,” John said, nodding, but not really looking like he meant it too much.  “I’ll give you a ring, or you ring me.”

Stuart looked to Rose. “Pleasure to meet you as well, Miss,”

“Thanks,” Rose shook his hand and then he shook John’s before putting his laptop back in his bag and standing up.

Stuart looked a little shaken as he left, like perhaps this was not the conversation that he was anticipating hearing. Rose felt a little bad for him.  

“You were a bit much,” She said softly, nudging her shoulder against his.  “He didn't’ know what was going on.”

“No, I suppose not,” John said, “But still, I didn’t know that… That she had lied to me.  She never told me about the yearly meetings, never told me who Lucy’s real father was. I don’t understand.”

Rose reached over and rubbed his back and she saw him being a bit vulnerable.  She leaned a little closer to him. “I don’t understand either.”

“She didn’t tell you anything, did she?”

“No,” Rose shook her head. “We didn’t have deep conversations, John, and if she didn't’ tell you that, I don’t know why you think she’d tell me.”

“You’re right,” he said, “I don’t know why I said that. Sorry.”

“It’s okay.  Hey, do you wanna get a cup of tea while we’re here?” 

“I’d rather get it back at my house,” he looked to her, “Would you like to come?”

She nodded. Regardless of what she had initially thought about what she should be doing or not doing with him, she thought that she would really like to spend time with him.  She squeezed his shoulder and hopped up.  “Come on then, let’s go.”

He took her hand as he stood up.  “Thanks, Rose.”

“For what?” She asked, furrowing her brows. “For coming with me.  For supporting me.  You know, all that.”

“Of course,” Rose said.  “You know I wouldn’t be here unless I wanted to be, so… Here I am.” She gestured out with one hand a little helplessly, not knowing quite what to do with her hands.  

He smiled at her.  “Here you are.”

The two of them nursed a cup of tea at his house before Rose questioned how quiet the house was.

“Where is everybody?” She asked, looking around.’

“I had Tanya watch them,” John said, “You know, I didn’t know how long our meeting with Stuart was going to take, so they’ll be back around seven.”

She checked her watch. It was only five. “Oh, well, if you wanted to go get them, I would understand, really-”

“Rose?” 

“Yeah?”

“I don’t want you to leave,” he said quietly. 

She stood up, “Well, thanks for the tea,” She said with forced cheerfulness, “Ring me if anything happens, yeah?”  
John stood too, and reached out to take hold of her upper arm.  “Rose, I just.... I really am fond of you, and I’m not sure if you understand just how fond of you I am.”

“I’m fond of you, too, John,” she said softly, “But are you-”

He cut her off by leaning forward and kissing her, his free hand cupping her cheek so gently that she could tell his hand was shaking.  She lifted her own hands so that her fingers were brushing his neck.  When he pulled away, his breathing was labored, and they’d barely  _ done  _ anything.

“John.”

“Yeah?”

“Are you sure- what are you- John, what is this?”

“I have never felt as alive as I do with you,” John told her, “I just haven’t.  I care about you so much, Rose, and I just find myself needing to be close to you.”

“You might just be using me, to repress whatever grief you’re feeling-”

He leaned forward and kissed her again.  This time, she didn’t resist, wrapping her arms all the way around his neck to hold him close. She’d wanted to kiss him again since she’d kissed him the first time, and this one was far better than the first one they’d shared. 

He wrapped his arms around her waist, holding her close.

Nothing she had ever experienced felt like this.  He was absolutely intoxicating, and she couldn’t get away from him, didn’t want to stop touching him.  He pulled his mouth from hers and started kissing down her neck, resting his forehead at the crook of her neck.

“Rose,” he said softly, squeezing her waist.

She pressed her nose into his hair and breathed out a long sigh, closing her eyes.  She suddenly remembered Mickey.  She couldn’t break up with him for John, could she? Especially when she didn’t know that they were going anywhere.

She barely had time to think about it when he was kissing her again and pushing her back against the wall, his hands up and down her waist, as though he was itching to touch every part of her that he could.

“John,” She gapsed in surprise, her hands flying to his hair as he kissed her collarbone.  His hand scrabbled for her leg and he pulled it up to his hip, making her head fall back more on surprise than anything. He was being more aggressive with her than she had ever imagined him being.  

“John, you- John.”

“Yes?” He asked, kissing back up to her mouth.

“Is this alright?”

He frowned at her. “Is it?”

“I want it to be.”

He kissed her again, slower this time, a bit more reverent, and then pulled away. “Oh.  You’re um, attached. I forgot.”

“I think-” she made a decision. “I think it’s time that I wasn’t, if you know what I mean. I know what I want.”

He cupped her cheek and pressed his forehead to hers. “Me too.”


	6. Chapter 6

Rose knew that she had to break up with Mickey, that it wasn’t really an option to stay with him anymore. It would just be unfaithful for her to stay with him.  She didn’t really love him anymore, she realized, and it made her wonder if she had ever really loved him at all. 

She was standing at the door to his flat, wringing her hands a little.  She didn't want to hurt him, but it was clear to her what she needed to do.  

He opened the door and smiled at her. “Hey, babe, what’s going on?”

Rose bit her lip.  He was so terribly trusting. “I’ve got to tell you something,” she said, blurting it out so fast she wanted to clap her hand over her mouth and stop herself.  

“Okay,” Mickey said, furrowing his brows. “Do you want to come inside?”

“No, I’ll just tell you out here,” Rose said, waving him off a little, ignoring the shake in her hand.  “I think we need to break up,” she said, not wanting to draw this conversation out any longer than it needed to be. 

Mickey raised his eyebrows at her and watched her for a few moments, like he didn’t quite know who to say to her.  “Are you- why? I thought we were doing well, thought that everything was going alright?”

Rose shook her head. “No, Micks, we haven’t been on a date in like, three months.  You never want to spend time with me, and you never want to advance the relationship. We’re not looking for the same things, you know?”

He didn’t, the way he was staring at her., “What, is this cause I didn’t want to move in or get married?” he asked, not necessarily angry, but certainly confused.  “You just want… What do you want, Rose?”

“I  _ want  _ to get married,” Rose said softly, looking down at her hands. “I want… I want kids.  And I wanna travel.  And i want so many things that you don’t.  It wouldn’t be fair for either of us to be with each other, because we’d be holding each other back from what we really want. You don’t ever want anything more than a girlfriend.”

“Is this because of John Smith?” Mickey demanded.

Rose’s jaw dropped. “What?”

“I’ve seen the way you talk about him,” Mickey said, crossing his arms. “And his bloody kids. You know he’s just using you, right? Cause his wife’s dead.”

“Stop it,” Rose said firmly, “That’s not anything- he holds no merit here. The two of us are wrong, Mickey, and I think you know it. But it’s just so forced between us.”

Mickey searched her eyes carefully.  “You really want to get married and have kids? That’s what you want?”

“There’s nothing wrong with that!” Rose said,  “I want to do other things too, of course, but it would be nice to have a family.  And I know you don’t think so.”

“Kids are a waste of time,” Mickey said slowly, “There’s other stuff I could be doing, that we could be doing.”

“But I want it,” Rose whispered, wondering how she could have stayed with a man like this for so long, who had nothing in common with her at all.  She felt tears building up in her eyes and pursed her lips, fighting them back. “Please, Mickey, let this go.”

“So you want to break up with me for an unstable widower?”

Rose frowned. “No.  I’m breaking up with you because we have no future together, and I want a future. I don’t see what’s so bloody wrong about that.”  She ran her hands through her hair. “I’m done, Mickey. I’m done.”  She put her hand up to stop his words and left him standing there, staring after her.

He wasn’t a bad man, not at all, but she wondered how she could have been so blind as to link herself to somebody who didn’t want any of the same things that she did.  She knew what she wanted, and even if it wasn’t John, at least now she knew where she was headed in life.  She breathed out a sigh and got in her car, driving away from Mickey’s flat as quickly as she could.  

A few nights later John called her again, and she was at his home in record time, seeing as unattached as she was. 

It was late, so the moment she opened the door he tugged her into a hut that made all the breath whoosh out of her.  She patted his back, a little unsure as to what was going on and not sure how she could let herself in on it.

“What’s wrong?” She asked.

“Nothing.” He replied, pulling back from her.  “Lucy and I had a bit of a- a fight, um, and I’m not quite sure how to respond to it.”

“About Stuart?”

“Yeah, she- she found out.  That we’d found him, and she wanted to know why you were allowed to know who her dad was, but she wasn’t.”

Rose furrowed her brows. “Because I’m a grown woman unattached to the situation and you needed support, and she’s a teenage girl,” she said a little roughly.  

John smiled weakly. “Yeah, that’s exactly what I told her,’ he said, “She likes you, you know.’   
“How could she possibly? I’ve only met her once,” Rose protested as John took her coat and led her into the house.  

“Well, sometimes that’s enough, you know?” He said, “She’s got a good brain in her head, you know.”

“Yeah,” Rose said, “I guess.  Are they asleep?”

“Yeah,” John nodded, “They are completely asleep.”

Rose arched her brow.  “Oh, and?” 

He tugged her against him by her waist and brushed his nose along hers. “So, we’re alone.”

“Kind of,” Rose whispered, wrapping her arms around his neck and waiting for him to do something about it.  

He leaned down and kissed her, so softly and slowly that she knew this was more than any amount of lust that might be eating at him in a time like this. This was something much later, something that Rose never thought she would be able to experience in her lifetime. 

His hands crept up her back and he deepened the kiss.  Rose thought she should probably tell him what was going on with her, so she pulled back and thumped his chest gently to get his attention.

“I- I broke up with MIckey,” She said, watching his face carefully, wanting him to say something, anything, but he seemed to be staring at her and thinking about exactly what he should say next.

“You did?” He said softly.

“Yeah,” She said, “I knew we didn’t want the same things, and he tried to tell me that I shouldn’t want to get married and have kids, or travel.”

“But you do,” John said, one hand gently stroking her back.  “You want more to life than he can offer you.”

“Yeah,” Rose said softly.  “I want more than something pointless, a bland existence.  Do you know what I mean?”

He smiled at her, the most honest smile that she had ever seen on him. It reached his eyes, making them twinkle quite pleasantly. He was really a beautiful man.  

She stroked her hand through his hair.  “I know what I want,” she told him steadily, “I know what’s best for me, and what I want to do.  And Mickey wasn’t any part of it.  You know that, don’t you?”

“Yes,” he said, “I know.”  He kissed her forehead and then kissed her full on again, pulling her further into the house, towards the living room.  She stumbled after him, not wanting to release him at all.  He lifted her a little higher, almost pulling her off her feet.  He sat down on the couch and Rose fell on top of him, straddling his hips.  

He watched her.  “Should I feel guilty that you broke up with Mickey?” he asked as she kissed his neck.

“Perhaps,” she said softly, shifting against him.  “Maybe you should feel horrible about it.  He brought you up.  Asked if I was doing it for you.”

“And are you?” he asked, forcing her to look him in the face.

She smiled a little.  “Partly,” She said, “But there was more to it than that, you’ve got to know that.”

“I do,’ John whispered, “I think I do, at least.”  He let out a little laugh that was a little breathless and perhaps a bit forced.  “I want to be happy again,” he told her. “I want to be happy with you, if that makes any sense at all.”

She laughed, “Why wouldn’t it make sense?”

“I’m finding loads of things in life no longer make sense, Rose Tyler,” he told her, and kissed her again before she could say anything else.

They didn’t make it very far, as John was running his hands up under her shirt and pulling her closer against him when they heard little footsteps on the stairs.

Rose pulled away from him with a gasp and rolled off of him, sitting on the couch next to him.  SHe adjusted herself just in time to see that Evie had wandered into the room, rubbing her eye. 

“Daddy?” She mumbled, and Rose felt her head hit the back of the couch.  She needed to calm herself down.

“Yes, sweetheart?” John said, walking to his daughter and sweeping her into his arms. He sat back down on the couch, looking back at his little girl, who sat on his lap.  “What’s wrong?”

“Couldn’t sleep,” Evie said softly.  “I’m sleepy, but I can’t sleep.” She yawned.  “What is MIss Rose doing here?”

“Miss Rose is my friend, dear,” John said.  “I think you should try to lay down and go to sleep, alright?”

“Okay,” Evie said sleepily.  “Will you tuck me in?”

“Yes, Evie, I’ll tuck you in,” he sounded a little bit exasperated, but he stood up and looked down at Rose.  “I’ll be right back,” he said to her before carrying his daughter back upstairs to her bed.  

Rose lay back, staring up at the ceiling.  She wanted to scream, or possibly punch someone in the head to make herself feel better.  Instead, she stood up and went to pick up her bag.  She should leave.

“Hey, where are you headed?” John asked, coming back down the stairs.

“I should go,” Rose said, voicing her thoughts, and jerking her thumb towards the door.  

“No, no,” he walked to her and put his hands on her shoulders. “We just need to not… Not really hang out around the house,” he laughed a little. 

She smiled at him, “Perhaps not right now, though,” she said, wrinkling her nose.  “You know, Evie is upstairs.”

He winced. “Yeah,” He said softly.  “Have I- I have a plan.  Not about this, mind you.”

“Okay,” Rose said, tilting her head, wanting him to go on.

“I want to run a paternity test on Lucy,” he said softly, “I don’t know if it’s Stuart, but I need to know.  I just have to.”

Rose smiled and stepped forward to hug him.  He sighed and pressed his face into her hair, holding her close.  She closed her eyes and sighed before she even spoke.  “Let me know if you need anything at all, John.  Please.”

“I will,” he said, “Believe me, if I say anything, it’s going to be to you.  I can barely trust anyone but you,” he said, and she felt her heart swell with happiness.

They stood in each other’s arms for awhile and Rose felt like perhaps this was what happiness meant with.  She had never fit in anyone’s arms the way she fit into John’s and it made her feel comfortable and safe.  But of course, she couldn’t stay there all night.  Especially with Evie and all the other kids upstairs.  Any one of them would wonder why Rose was in their father’s bed. 

Reluctantly, she moved to kiss his cheek goodbye and then pulled back to kiss him chastely.  “But for now, I think I should go.”

He nodded. “Probably. Sorry.”

She grinned. “Not your fault.” And she said the riskiest thing she had ever said to him.  “See you tomorrow?”

He nodded without hesitation.  “Yes.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter! I hope you guys enjoyed this! The last chapter is a bit longer than normal so I could tie everything up and make everybody happy.

Rose was surprised when John wanted to see her more consistently after that.  For the next few months they were seeing each other regularly, and it made her a little bit nervous. She was sure he wasn't just using her, but she wanted to make sure that she was what he really wanted, that she wasn’t something he’d toss aside when he’d moved past whatever grief he was still working his way through. 

“Rose?” he called her late one night, “I- um, I need to see you, perhaps tomorrow I guess, it’s a bit late.”

Rose checked her watch. It was about midnight, and usually Rose wasn’t even up this late, but she hadn’t been able to sleep tonight.  She supposed it was luck that she hadn’t.  “Wait, John, don’t hang up,” she said quickly.

“Yeah?” He said softly.

“What’s wrong?” Rose asked him, setting down the book she’d been reading.  “What’s happening?”

“I just- I’ve found something out about Romana, and I need to do something about it.  I can’t talk to her family, or our friends, I just need you.”

“Why don’t you come round here?” She said without thinking. “See if Tanya can watch the kids tonight, she stays up late doing work most nights, and then we can have a cuppa and a bit of a chat, yeah?”

He was silent for a couple moments, and then said softly, “Yeah, I’ll try her.  Thank you.  _ Thank you.” _

She smiled, knowing he couldn’t see it. “Of course. I’ll put the kettle on.”

“I’ll be round.”

Rose gave him her address and he told her that he would be round as soon as he could.  And, holding true, he was at her flat in a half hour, the kettle just squealing as he knocked on her door.

She opened the door and looked at his bedraggled face.  He was holding his bike helmet in his hands, his knuckles turning white with the grip. A glance at his hair and jacket told her that it was raining quite heavily.  

“Did you drive here on your motorcycle?”

He nodded wordlessly.

“John,” she said, exasperated, “You’ll catch your death.  Come in, come on,” she ushered him inside.  She took his coat and put it in the closet with her things.  He was still standing in her doorway, just inside the door to her flat.

She felt herself soften a bit when she looked at the way he was staring into nothing.  “John?” She moved closer to him until she was standing in front of him.  He moved his gaze from the space in front of him to look down into Rose’s eyes.  She cupped his cheek and stroked her thumb over the skin.  “What’s happened?”

“What  _ hasn’t  _ happened?” John asked bitterly.  “I’ve- Stuart is Lucy’s father, and now she wants to move in with him because he’s her dad.  And I found out- I kept reading her diaries, Romana’s, and I- she wasn’t faithful.”

Rose felt her heart drop. “Oh, John,” She said softly, and moved forward to wrap her arms around his waist.  His breath heaved and he held her close, pressing his nose to her temple.  “What happened?”

“She met with Stuart and I’m sure now that she wasn’t just meeting with him to talk about Lucy.” John took a deep breath. “I just don’t know how I could’ve been so blind. What if they’re not even mine?  Ewan, Paul, Evie, what if none of them are mine?”

Rose wanted to reassure him, and knowing that she couldn’t, that she  _ didn’t  _ have the answer he was looking for, made her heart break.  She squeezed him tightly.  “You could get a paternity test done.”

“No,” he said, pulling back from her and walking to her couch, sitting down heavily.  “No, I don’t want to know. That’s not… I can’t possibly.  I’ve raised them, Rose, they’re my children, but what if they’re his?  And I have to give them all up?”

“You won’t,” Rose said firmly, “Romana wasn’t showing Stuart pictures of your other children.”  She got on her knees in front of him, pulling his hands from his face.  “Look at me, John.  You are not going to lose your children. They’re your  _ children.” _

John reached out and took a piece of her hair between his fingers.  “I don’t deserve you,” he said softly.  “I don’t even know why this is bothering me so much.”

“Probably because this is something you never expected,” Rose suggested, reaching up to stroke a hand through his hair. “How were you to even suspect that Romana was doing anything?”

“Did she ever say anything to you?” John asked quietly, obviously not wanting the answer if it was yes.

“No,” Rose said firmly, and shook her head. “No.  I would’ve told you.”

“Why? You didn’t know me.”

“Because I don’t think anyone who is married deserves to live in the dark,” She said, “Not that it would have ever been my business.  But from what I saw, I saw that she loved you.”

“I’m starting to wonder,” John whispered.  “I really am.” He cracked his knuckles and looked away from Rose.  “But I want to let go of her.”

Rose bit her lip.  She knew that, she had tried to pretend that he didn’t, but she knew that something about their relationship was something that he wanted to get rid of.  “You don’t have to stop remembering her.”

“I don’t want to remember her fondly, not anymore.  She is not the person that I thought she was,” he furrowed his brows. “But I already think that you are less likely to lie to me.  I mean, I should have seen it coming, she had her diaries  _ locked up  _ for God’s sake.  I had to cut through the bloody lock with bolt cutters.”

“You couldn’t have known!” Rose said, growing more irritated with him. “Look at me, John.”  She waited until he did. “You are not the end all be all of every piece of knowledge. You are brilliant, I know you are.  But this is not your fault. None of this is your fault, and you couldn’t have known.  She was your wife and you trusted her, and that’s all you need to know.”

He sniffed and looked up at the ceiling.  When he spoke, his voice was strained and hoarse.  “Can I have a cuddle?” He said. 

Rose felt her heart break once more, and she crawled up onto the couch next to him.  He pulled her into his arms and held her tightly. 

“You’re not using me for a replacement, are you?” Rose asked softly, “Just because you’re mad at her?”

“No,” John said firmly, “I told you, the two of you are not associated together in my mind.”

She nodded. She believed him, she did, but it was times when he spaced out like this that she got worried. Though she supposed that made sense, since he had just found out that his wife had been  _ cheating  _ on him.

“John, I really do think it would help you to get a paternity test,” She said softly, “To confirm or deny.”

“Rose, I can’t.”

She pulled back and looked at him, settling one hand on his knee.  “You will mope forever if you don’t know.  I know you now, remember, I know the sort of things that you do.  You dwell.”

“How am I so easy for you to read?”

She pushed his fringe off his forehead and kissed him before snuggling up next to him. ‘I just do. What did you tell Tanya before you came over here?”

“I told her that i needed to see you, that you’re the only friend I can talk to,” he replied, stroking a hand up and down her arm, making her feel very relaxed indeed.  “It’s true, you know.  I’ve never felt any sort of openness like I do with you.”

She hummed happily and snuggled closer to him. “Really?”

“You don’t keep secrets. I know you don’t. You were upfront with me about everything you’ve spoken to me about, and that… That means more than you will ever know, I’m sure of it.”

She closed her eyes and nodded against his chest.  “How long can you stay?” She murmured. 

“As long as you like,” he replied, his voice deep and rough.  He kissed her temple and shifted so that he was more facing her than anything else.  She tilted her chin up to him to meet the kiss that he was tentatively offering her, like he was afraid that she would say no to him, or push him away.  She couldn’t.  She was falling in love with him and she could admit that now.  She wrapped her arms around his neck and he drew her closer and, following his prompting, she got into his lap, straddling his hips.  It was the same position they had been in when Evie had interrupted them, but of course, Rose lived alone.

His hands dug into her waist and he pulled her closer to him.  Rose had wanted someone to love her for a very long time, and she had a feeling that he was the one.  Maybe Mickey had loved her, but he had never loved her like she wanted. There was no passion, it was so bland.  Everything was simple, there was never anything that could have shaken them.  And they were never going to progress any further. 

There was something different about John.  There was adventure about him, something that made her feel so much better about the future.  She wanted to have him in her life for as long as he would have her.  

She pushed her hands up into his hair and held tight, knowing he wasn’t going anywhere but almost wondering if he would try to leave if this got too far.  

“I’ll do it,” he said, pulling away from her mouth. “I’m going to get the paternity test.”

“Not if you don’t want to,” Rose said, sitting back to look him in the eye.  He nodded and stroked his hand on her side. 

“I- I want this to be over. I don’t want the ghost of someone that doesn’t matter haunting me.”

“Stuart?”

“Yeah,” John said softly.  He pressed his forehead to her shoulder and pulled her into a hug.  She rested her cheek on the top of his head and pulled him against her.  He sighed, a little contented sound that made Rose smiled.

It was still raining, and Rose realized that while she didn’t want him to go home, she really wanted him to stay with her, and perhaps that was selfish of her, but she was getting used to having him near her and she wanted him near as long as possible.  “Maybe we should go to bed,” She said softly.

He looked up at her. ‘Are you sure?”

“Yeah.”

He kissed her softly, trying to convey everything he felt for her into it.  “Okay, lead the way.”

She didn’t move, and jerked her head over her shoulder. “Down the hall, second left.”

He jostled his knee, “Dear, you’ll have to get off me.”

“No I won’t.” She leaned forward and bit his neck, grinning a little when his head hit the back of the couch.  

Taking her lead, he settled one hand under her and one around her back before lifting her up in his arms. He kissed her shoulder and followed her instructions back to her room.  He sat down on the bed and they resumed when they had started out in the living room.

“We forgot about the tea,” he mumbled against her mouth (once he got back up there).

“Sod the tea,” she said, and he quite had to agree with her.

************

John took the paternity test a couple months later and sent them to the lab, promptly forgetting about them. Rose became a fixture around the Tyler house (theirs, not hers) and Ewan, Paul, and Evie all took a shine to her being around.  Lucy, however, was still living with her father, though she visited often enough.  Rose could tell that John missed having her in his house all the time, and she couldn’t really say that she blamed him.  He had raised Lucy, after all, even though she wasn’t his.

When the paternity test came in, the whole day was a mess.  It was a Saturday, so all the kids were out at their various activities and Rose was with John, watching a movie on his couch. 

“What do you think for dinner tonight?” John asked, rubbing her foot where it rested on his thigh. 

She peered over at him. “You know, that’s the first time you’ve asked me that?”

“What?”

“Yeah, usually you’d just mumble ‘takeaway?’ and that was all I’d get out of you.  Really weird, you.”

“Thank you.”

She giggled. “I’m serious. But now, you’ve… You’ve got a zest for life, my dear.”

“I have a zest for you.”

She laughed and poked him in the side with her toes.  “Don’t say that, that’s weird.”

He opened his mouth to respond when the sound of the daily mail hitting the floor made his ears perk up. He leaned across her and kissed her. “Be right back.”

“Mm-hmm.”

When he came back into the room, he was holding one letter, a stricken look on his face.  Rose sat up straight. 

“Is it here?” She asked softly, and he nodded, coming over to sit next to her.  He held the envelope in trembling hands and she wrapped an arm around his shoulder, kissing his cheek.  “Go ahead.”  
“I don’t want to know.”

“You wouldn’t have taken the test if you thought you didn’t want the results,” Rose said, resting her head on his shoulder.  

He nodded. “Okay,” he said softly. He opened the envelope slowly, and unfolded the letter.  Rose couldn’t really read it from her position, and she had a feeling that it wasn’t her place, so she just waited for him to say something.  It took several moments before he choked on a sob.

“They’re mine,’ he said softly. “My kids, they’re mine.”  His voice was full of joy even if it was thick with tears.

Rose wrapped her arms around him and kissed his cheek over and over until he turned to her and wrapped her up in his arms, pulling her close.  He was crying openly now, the stress that had held him so taut finally releasing him.  The two of them started to laugh and he she continued to press kisses all over his face. 

And the icing on the cake?  Lucy came over about two hours later. She was crying, and since John had since recovered and stored the paternity test away, he looked to Rose before going to her and wrapping her up in a hug.

“What’s wrong?” He asked her.

“I need to talk to you,” She said.  “Both of you.”

John looked exasperated, because it had really been quite a day, but he led Lucy to the couch and sat her between him and Rose.  Rose didn’t know what she had to do with it, and chewed her bottom lip as Lucy started to cry harder and explain.

“S’awful, livin’ with him,” She said, “Like, everything has to be just so, and I can’t live like that.  Everything is awful. I can’t put my feet on the couch, like I can here, I can’t do  _ anything.   _ I feel like I'm at a museum all the time.” 

John wrapped an arm around her and squeezed her tightly.  “What do you want to do?” He asked her softly.

“I want to come back home,” Lucy said, “He’s my father,” she turned to John, “But you’re my dad.”

John couldn’t stop himself from smiling and he hugged her again.  “Of course you can come back.”

“Will you tell him for me?”  
“No, sweetheart, you have to do that.”

Lucy nodded and wiped her nose. She turned to Rose a little. “I wanted to hate you.”

Rose blinked. “Oh.”

“But I don’t. Cause I can see that Dad loves you,” Lucy looked down at her hands. “And I was talkin’ to Evie, and Ewan and Paul, and they all love you a lot.  And I love you too, Miss Rose.  I just want a family.  I don’t want to live with a man who’s my dad and lives alone and is barely at home anyway.”

“Are you calling me a part of the family?” Rose asked softly, feeling dreadfully touched.

“Yes,” Lucy said, and started to cry harder.  “Yeah, I am.”

Then Rose started crying, because everyone else had already cried and really, it was her turn. She hugged Lucy as well, and soon the three of them were all hugging and crying on the couch.  

Things weren’t normal for them.  It took a long time to live a normal life, but a year and a half later, John asked Rose to marry him, and it still wasn’t normal after that.  

But everyone got the love that they wanted and deserved, and that was all that really mattered in the end.  Rose, of course, was not expecting to have four children upon getting married, but she had to admit that now that it had happened, she didn’t want it any other way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please Review?


End file.
